Working, writing, and romance?

Well yes, I can actually make time for everything. That doesn't mean I get sleep - sheesh, let's be realistic.

Actually things have been going alright. I just got over being REALLY crazy sick... now my mom is. We're going to the doctor for her tomorrow and keeping our fingers crossed.

Work is well - work. It's what I do, I'm there - a lot. I deal.

Writing. I'm so very happy to say I'm writing again. And doing good. I've hit the 10k (words) mark and only have 60k more to go before it's novel sized. I'm working in conjunction with Nikki and it's going to be quite fun. I'll get around to posting some eventually. But check hers out. She's Wraith Two on my watchers list.

And romance? Well here's hopin' for the best. I found a wonderful guy up in Tampa and I can't wait to get up there this Saturday. Wish me luck everyone... I'm making some changes to this boring little life!

So here I am, day in day out, trudging along to whatever comes next. I can't say I'm really happy... but I'm not teetering on the border of depression either. Things are as they are - progressive, ever changing.

People change, life changes, jobs change, the world around us growing and evolving. I used to hate change. I downright feared it. All of the change was always bad, and I suppose in a child's eyes, that's all one could expect. I see now the purpose behind change.

If you look at a pool of stagnate water, you see bacteria, grime and dirt building up. But if you look at an ever flowing creek, the water is clear, cool, and inviting. That's what change does. It keeps us fresh, always on our toes. We learn things from change that make us stronger and better.

For now I'll follow, because I have nothing better to do on my own.

Well I finished my book. I nailed it just over 50k which is good. Then of course I start looking for publishers online and their minimum word requirement is 65k. Figures, but such is the way of life, I accept it. This just means that I'll finish part 2, combine the books and submit it all at once.

I've had a lot on my mind lately. Holidays are a lonely time of the year, then there's of course strenuous conditions that seem to make things even lonelier. Even if I do find someone, then what? I've got a lot of baggage for someone to deal with, and I'm not even talking emotional. I was so ready for life to work out... I guess I dove when I should have waded.

Christmas is right around the corner. I've got Ethan bought for, 2 of my nephews and part of Nik's. I have to figure out what to do for my other nephew. I decided I'm making family members cookies. I don't have the $$ for anything more, so instead I'll bless them with larger thighs XD. What's love if I can't torment them some right?

After Xmas is inventory, after inventory is phase changes, and after THAT... I've told James I want out of my position. I want full time, but I just don't want the responsibility of being Back of House (which pretty much means I'm in charge of operations in the store [truck, merchandising, special projects, you name it]). He agreed, but I think I'll stick w/ Jeanie's advice and keep on him about it. Otherwise he'll leave me stuck again for next year.

Part of me wants to just head up to Washington with Nik. Change of scenery, a fresh start, away from the uselessness of Bradenton. I SO hate Bradenton. This is a pathetic town. I have obligations and responsibilities here though... maybe in a year or so I'll be able to make the trip... well... IF I decide I like it after the road trip we take. That's an awfully long way to go.

I better go get some sleep. Saturday and Sunday are really the only days I have to sleep a lot, and here I am writing in a journal instead of taking advantage of it. Heh... I'm smart! Oy.

1. That which is determined upon; result of deliberation; purpose; conclusion formed; fixed resolution.
2. Direction or tendency to a certain end; impulsion.

My determination... is to finally and completely finish my book. It's NanoWrimo (National Novel Writing Month) and I've entered. This means I have to exceed 50k words by the end of the month. I already had an outline prepared, I did it back in may, a very in depth and detailed outline of exactly what I would be writing. So I sit here with 2 word documents open, typing as I read over my notes.

It's going quickly so far, and I'm very pleased, though it's kinda taking over my mind like it did before when I worked on getting the ideas out. I also borrowed Buffy the Vampire Slayer from Nikki and have been using it as a reward. I'll write for a little while, watch an episode or two of Buffy, write a little more.

Currently I'm past 14k words and I'm the last disc of season 2. I'm making quite a few changes to my original outline and idea, but hopefully it's only for the better. Luckily Buffy is inspiring me to brush up on my jokes.

I'd forgotten how much I loved that show... it's been YEARS since I've watched it, and it's just as good as I remember. It hasn't lost that charm that some shows do after not watching them forever.

Anyway... Check me out on NanoWrimo, I have a short excerpt up there. [link] Once I get a little more, or have come closer to publishing it, maybe I'll post a little of it here.

So... I'm working nights at Toys R Us. I have currently 3 other people on my crew, Jeanie, Dana, and Cliff. We've started taking 45min - hour long lunches in an attempt to cut down on our hours. This doesn't actually work, but like I said, it's an attempt.

Anyway, I told Dana tonight that she should be a comedian. She has had me laughing so hard that I've been afraid of peeing myself at times. Tonight was no different. We're tired, overworked, and a wee bit delerious, and Dana started talking about what she wanted for her birthday.

"A midget!" We just look at her. "I should have told Joe, I wanna midget for my birthday!" Of course I pipe up w/, you have 2 kids, wish granted! Anyway, she was talking about all the things she would have the midget do. When people come over, she'd introduce the midget and warn that it bites and various weird shit. Then - "... have them dress up like an Oompa Loompa" Her face brightens

"That's even better! Joe, I want a Oompa Loompa for my birthday!" I told her he'd probably go looking for Jacob (her son). She was like, we could get a lot of little kid midgets, dress them up like Oompa Loompa's and sell them here! Keep them in a little cage up front. It'll be part of the daily checklist for one of the managers to feed the Oompa Loompa's every day!"

I of course said this would have to be Betsy's job since she's in charge of the register lanes where all the candy is. Jeanie pointed out that Ken and Betsy would probably sit around all day throwing candy at the Oompa Loompas. I said, then of course they'd get out and run around, we'd have to go catch them... we'd call a Code Wonka. Dana suggested having Oompa Loompa races.

I'm sure the conversation probably wasn't that funny... but like I said, we've all been a little delirious and I found myself laughing SO hard, so I had to share.

No, I don't have anything against midgets
No, I don't condone throwing candy at Oompa Loompa's
Yes, I think I might dress Ethan up as a Oompa Loompa for Halloween XD

I realized that I surround myself w/ funny people... I think it's to substitute for my lack of humorous originality... Whatever the cause, never the dull moment.

Of course, it's not all fun and games at night. I'm so stressed out I could cry. We're WAY behind and we're getting visited on Wednesday... but we don't go back to work until Tuesday night. I have no idea how I'm going to get caught up. Cliff is REALLY slow and I can't seem to motivate him, Dana and Jeanie are great, but there's only so much 3 people can do!

Of course this affects what goes on at home... I've developed insomnia... I, the woman who could fall asleep anywhere, anytime, for hours on end... can't sleep! I have this constant fuzziness in my head (along w/ a slight headache). Every time I go to sleep, I either have nightmares about how far behind I am at work, or I wake up nervous, looking for a clock cause I'm afraid I'm going to be late. I've taken to drinking those energy drinks at night (not enough to cause my insomnia, just one around lunch time), but they keep me awake better than coffee.

I'm off tonight and tomorrow night. It doesn't really equal into having a 2 DAYS off because I worked this morning, and I go to work Tuesday... but it's close enough. It gives me a chance to get things done or visit. I wanna give Nik a call and see what's up. I haven't had a chance to talk to her in a few days because I've been trying in vain to catch up a little on my sleep when I'm at home, or I've been moving... all week. I don't think it's ever going to be done.

Anyway, Ethan's up!